What’s The Noise?

Imagine the situation: The adults of the family are sat in the lounge, the toddler is out the room, and you hear a noise.

Question: What Is the noise?

A) The bin being turned inside out.
B) The Fridge being emptied.
C) Toys being thrown downstairs.
D) The dishwasher being filled with your phone.
E) Your secret chocolate stash being found!
F) All of the above, at the same time, with various options being repeated in a random basis.

If you’ve heard a noise recently, and you’re not sure where your little person is… Good luck.

To Use A Dummy, Or Not To Use A Dummy.

(This is an updated version of a blog post from an old blog.)
There seems to be a question that every parent to be hsa to face at one point…

Should we use a Dummy?

In the words of the Good Lady Wife on Facebook:

It’s amazing how great plans for parenthood can go out of the window once you are a parent! I always said I’d avoid using a dummy, but at this moment in time I am so glad that I have one. Kate hasn’t had a solid chunk of sleep this afternoon, so she’s tired, and I’m tired & have backache from constantly carrying her around/holding her. She’s been changed LOTS, isn’t hungry but does keep yawning & dozing off for a few mins. A dummy in and she’s fallen asleep to the extent that she didn’t wake when I put her in the Moses basket! Silence is golden!

Heres the thing.

I’m not sure exactly when we made up our minds on this, it could have been just over the last few months, it might have even been way before the Good Lady Wife was even pregnant. But either way, at some point we had the chat. You know, the “chat” when you and your wife / girlfriend / boyfriend / husband / pet dog / parenting partner / whatever, sit down and talk “dummies”. Specifically, are you, or are you not going to have a dummy pushed into the face of your baby?

I’ll be blunt.

This isn’t something we researched, it was a quick conversation, and it was based on the image of toddlers having dummies pushed into their mouths whenever they tried to talk.

So. We said no. Not going to use a dummy.

If our child has something to scream about, we need to work out what it is, and there was also some comment about teeth growth as well…

So no. No dummies.

Then one morning… Hospital-Teddy

The first morning of our child’s life. At about 3 ish. There I am. Tired and putting one foot in font of the other. Walking away from my wife who’s just emerged from an operation, down the labor ward corridor to find my daughter in the Intensive Care section of Neonatal. My head is all over the place. In the last few hours I had said goodbye to my wife as staff got her ready for an operation, and I had seen an oxygen mask over my daughters face as she was rushed to Intensive Care.

While I was walking along, lost in my world of worry, I looked up and saw one of wonderful neonatal nurses who was looking after my daughter come the other way to find me.

She was smiling.

Thank God.

She explained to me that Kate was struggling to settle, and the she was coming up to ask if we minded them trying a dummy.

I smiled.

Having the two most important people in your life looked after by the beautiful staff of the NHS puts things into perspective.

For a moment I laughed, then I simply said: “yeah”.

It’s amazing how quickly a mind can change at 3 am.

My personal take on the whole discussion about if  you should use a dummy or not; consider it as a tool in your parenting box of tricks.

If you’re after a serious list of facts about the use of dummies, I’d suggest checking out babycentre.co.uk

What Toys To Bring To Church

Christmas with a toddler, I’m sure you can imagine brings its share of challenges and joys. Challenges are such as wondering how much chocolate you should allow them to eat, and for yourself, how much alcohol can you drink on Christmas Eve, and cope with the earlier wake up on Christmas Day. The joys… well… there are toys, Toys, and more TOYS.

But what toys should you bring to church?

We’ve done a bit of research and have found the following (mostly toddler) toys that are possibly perfect for church:

Daniel and the lion’s den

DanielAndTheLionsDen

Includes a hole to play “Boo” through, an excuse to pretend to loudly eat Daniel, and a chance to make lion style “Raaaa!” noises. With no inbuilt noises, this would be a great toy to keep little ones quiet in church. Found at Amazon.

Bible Opoly Board Game

Bibleopoly

Do you enjoy those Monopoly inspired arguments? How about having an excuse to have those arguments in the back of the church hall? Bearing in mind this is “A monopoly version where cooperation and not accumulation is the key”, I cant help but feel that if youre sneaky enough to win at Monopoly, then you’ll win at this. Just remember to make your peace with each other before communion. Found at Amazon.

I’m sure toddlers would love playing with the money, or consuming the church pieces!

Plan of Salvation Ball.

HeavenBall

According to the product description, this is “A squeeze ball to throw around and learn about God’s plan for salvation.” Perfect for a game of catch during the service. Even better for toddlers learning how to throw. Bonus points if the vicar needs to catch it at any point. Found at eden.co.uk

Plush Jonah and Fish.

Plush-Jonah

Perfect for joining in with a baptism service… and the ensuring scream when the child in question starts to realise that the fish doesn’t actually swim. Found at eden.co.uk

Plush Noahs Ark 10 Piece Play Set.

Plush-Noah-Ark

All those animals! For so long!

Did they all get on all the time? Or were there massive arguments? Did a monkey try fighting a lion?

Bring this toy to church and let your little one work it out!

Found at eden.co.uk

Tambourines!

We’re told to make a joyful noise to the Lord! Make a joyful noise with these “Make a Joyful Noise Tambourines”. Great for use during sermons!

Make-A-Joyful-Noise

 

Found over at designed2bsweet.com.

Be David!

DavidAndGoliath

Dont just listen to the sermon / talk on David and Goliath.

Your kids could be David with this slingshot!

Again bonus points if they (you) hit the speaker!

Hope you find this useful. Please share in the comments below if you know of any other useful toys to bring to church.

This originally appeared on The Church Sofa.

Doctor Who Life Advice To Tell Your Children.

She was looking up it. It was looking down at her. All of a sudden, I couldn’t help but say “If the Shop Dummy starts moving by itself, then run. Quick.” Whilst I thought that this was important Doctor Who inspired life advice to give the little one, the good lady wife didn’t seem to convinced. I still couldn’t help but wonder what other nuggets of life advice could be learned from watching Doctor Who.

Know when to say Goodbye

Remembering people we’ve lost is ok.

If shop window dummies start moving. Run.

Does that plastic chair feel alive? Probably best not to sit on it.

Always do the best you can. Particularly when fighting monsters.

If you want to wear a fez. Wear a fez. (But people may remove it from you)

Times change. So must I. (or something like that anyway)

Fear. Doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

Any more out there?