Take Your New Born / Baby to Church Survival Kit

It’s been a few months now of smuggling the little one into Church, and pretending that she also knows when she to be quiet, when to make noise, etc…

After a while we figured we needed a selection of special tools to distract, entertain, and comfort her while ensuring her parents also get a chance to take part in the service.

So we’re proud to present, the “Take Your New Born / Baby to Church Survival Kit”:

  1. Dummies
  2. Muslin to cover up the fact your using a dummy.
  3. Energy drink – Because having coffee after the service is a little late.
  4. Note pad, and pen – useful for things such as funny drawings, paper plane material, and possibly sermon notes.
  5. Church Approved Toy. (Does not make noise, nor make other kids, or preacher jealous that he/she can’t play with said toy).
  6. Nappy bag – with enough nappies to last the length of the sermon.
  7. Milk bottles containing Ministry Approved Milk.
  8. Breakfast – because you were busy before the service making sure everyone else ate!
  9. Push Chair. So you can race other “drivers” around the church hall.
  10. Map containing directions to nearest exit – in case of sudden ‘exit’ issues…
  11. Children’s Bible – because we all need help understanding sermons sometimes.
  12. A note in your organiser letting you know that the service is starting 30 mins earlier… you’re never going to get there on time otherwise…

Any more that we’ve missed?

This is a slightly updated version of an old post.

What’s The Noise?

Imagine the situation: The adults of the family are sat in the lounge, the toddler is out the room, and you hear a noise.

Question: What Is the noise?

A) The bin being turned inside out.
B) The Fridge being emptied.
C) Toys being thrown downstairs.
D) The dishwasher being filled with your phone.
E) Your secret chocolate stash being found!
F) All of the above, at the same time, with various options being repeated in a random basis.

If you’ve heard a noise recently, and you’re not sure where your little person is… Good luck.

The Dad Book?

Ever had the feeling there’s a Dad Book?

You know, some thing that says how to build the best train tracks, always be able to play catch, and contain the secret to getting home from work on time?

Obviously, this book needs an answer to every “Why” question a child could possibly ask.

It seems that Calvins Dad has this Dad Book!

Dad Book of knowledgeWheres my copy?

 

To Use A Dummy, Or Not To Use A Dummy.

(This is an updated version of a blog post from an old blog.)
There seems to be a question that every parent to be hsa to face at one point…

Should we use a Dummy?

In the words of the Good Lady Wife on Facebook:

It’s amazing how great plans for parenthood can go out of the window once you are a parent! I always said I’d avoid using a dummy, but at this moment in time I am so glad that I have one. Kate hasn’t had a solid chunk of sleep this afternoon, so she’s tired, and I’m tired & have backache from constantly carrying her around/holding her. She’s been changed LOTS, isn’t hungry but does keep yawning & dozing off for a few mins. A dummy in and she’s fallen asleep to the extent that she didn’t wake when I put her in the Moses basket! Silence is golden!

Heres the thing.

I’m not sure exactly when we made up our minds on this, it could have been just over the last few months, it might have even been way before the Good Lady Wife was even pregnant. But either way, at some point we had the chat. You know, the “chat” when you and your wife / girlfriend / boyfriend / husband / pet dog / parenting partner / whatever, sit down and talk “dummies”. Specifically, are you, or are you not going to have a dummy pushed into the face of your baby?

I’ll be blunt.

This isn’t something we researched, it was a quick conversation, and it was based on the image of toddlers having dummies pushed into their mouths whenever they tried to talk.

So. We said no. Not going to use a dummy.

If our child has something to scream about, we need to work out what it is, and there was also some comment about teeth growth as well…

So no. No dummies.

Then one morning… Hospital-Teddy

The first morning of our child’s life. At about 3 ish. There I am. Tired and putting one foot in font of the other. Walking away from my wife who’s just emerged from an operation, down the labor ward corridor to find my daughter in the Intensive Care section of Neonatal. My head is all over the place. In the last few hours I had said goodbye to my wife as staff got her ready for an operation, and I had seen an oxygen mask over my daughters face as she was rushed to Intensive Care.

While I was walking along, lost in my world of worry, I looked up and saw one of wonderful neonatal nurses who was looking after my daughter come the other way to find me.

She was smiling.

Thank God.

She explained to me that Kate was struggling to settle, and the she was coming up to ask if we minded them trying a dummy.

I smiled.

Having the two most important people in your life looked after by the beautiful staff of the NHS puts things into perspective.

For a moment I laughed, then I simply said: “yeah”.

It’s amazing how quickly a mind can change at 3 am.

My personal take on the whole discussion about if  you should use a dummy or not; consider it as a tool in your parenting box of tricks.

If you’re after a serious list of facts about the use of dummies, I’d suggest checking out babycentre.co.uk

What Toys To Bring To Church

Christmas with a toddler, I’m sure you can imagine brings its share of challenges and joys. Challenges are such as wondering how much chocolate you should allow them to eat, and for yourself, how much alcohol can you drink on Christmas Eve, and cope with the earlier wake up on Christmas Day. The joys… well… there are toys, Toys, and more TOYS.

But what toys should you bring to church?

We’ve done a bit of research and have found the following (mostly toddler) toys that are possibly perfect for church:

Daniel and the lion’s den

DanielAndTheLionsDen

Includes a hole to play “Boo” through, an excuse to pretend to loudly eat Daniel, and a chance to make lion style “Raaaa!” noises. With no inbuilt noises, this would be a great toy to keep little ones quiet in church. Found at Amazon.

Bible Opoly Board Game

Bibleopoly

Do you enjoy those Monopoly inspired arguments? How about having an excuse to have those arguments in the back of the church hall? Bearing in mind this is “A monopoly version where cooperation and not accumulation is the key”, I cant help but feel that if youre sneaky enough to win at Monopoly, then you’ll win at this. Just remember to make your peace with each other before communion. Found at Amazon.

I’m sure toddlers would love playing with the money, or consuming the church pieces!

Plan of Salvation Ball.

HeavenBall

According to the product description, this is “A squeeze ball to throw around and learn about God’s plan for salvation.” Perfect for a game of catch during the service. Even better for toddlers learning how to throw. Bonus points if the vicar needs to catch it at any point. Found at eden.co.uk

Plush Jonah and Fish.

Plush-Jonah

Perfect for joining in with a baptism service… and the ensuring scream when the child in question starts to realise that the fish doesn’t actually swim. Found at eden.co.uk

Plush Noahs Ark 10 Piece Play Set.

Plush-Noah-Ark

All those animals! For so long!

Did they all get on all the time? Or were there massive arguments? Did a monkey try fighting a lion?

Bring this toy to church and let your little one work it out!

Found at eden.co.uk

Tambourines!

We’re told to make a joyful noise to the Lord! Make a joyful noise with these “Make a Joyful Noise Tambourines”. Great for use during sermons!

Make-A-Joyful-Noise

 

Found over at designed2bsweet.com.

Be David!

DavidAndGoliath

Dont just listen to the sermon / talk on David and Goliath.

Your kids could be David with this slingshot!

Again bonus points if they (you) hit the speaker!

Hope you find this useful. Please share in the comments below if you know of any other useful toys to bring to church.

This originally appeared on The Church Sofa.

Cheese and Vegetable Muffins Recipe

A fair while ago, the good lady wife found a recipe for Cheese and Vegetable Muffins at the My Daddy Cooks website. Times have changed and that recipe has disappeared, thankfully the internet doesn’t forget useful things so easily, and I found the same Cheese and Vegetable Muffins recipe over on one of the Baby Centre forums. (More about that some other day).

Anyway… I’ve pasted the recipe below so I can personally find it easier next time:

Cheese and vegetable muffins
Makes 9 large muffins or 18 small ones
Preparation time 15 minutes, cooking time 20 minutes

3 or 4 broccoli florets and one leek, steamed and chopped up (you really can use any vegetables – spinach, courgettes and carrots all work very well. You can also add ham or bacon).
6-8 cherry tomatoes, de-seeded and chopped up
100g grated mature cheddar
225g self-raising flour
175ml milk
55ml olive oil
1 free-range egg

Preheat your oven to 200°C (180°C for a fan oven)/ 400°F

Once you have steamed your vegetables (if you are using carrots or courgettes you can simply grate them up, there is no need to pre-cook them), mix them together with the cheese and the flour. Add in the wet ingredients and mix to a lumpy, fairly thick batter.

Lightly oil some muffin tins, spoon the mixture in to fill each one to the top, place the tray in the middle of the oven and leave to cook for 20 minutes. The muffins are ready when they are brown on top and fairly dense to the touch.

Best served warm, 5-10 minutes after coming out of the oven

This has gone down well in our house, particularly when little one was weaning.

Hopefully you’ll also enjoy!

Watching Bing on Cbeebies

Our Little One is very very much into watching Bing on Cbeebies, and because of the series record feature on our YouView… she seems to have discovered the joys of binge watching Bing.

Obviously this means I have also discovered the joys of watching Bing (and learning how to make the most use of its 7 minute run time). While watching the same episode for what felt like the 20th time, my wife and I started to ask ourselves a few questions, and generally over think about Bing and some of his friends:

why does pando in Bing, only wears pants? Why Does Pando keep taking off his trousers?What is the deal with Pando’s trousers?

Whenever you see him in the TV show, the guy is running around in his underwear, except for one moment at the very start when he takes his trousers off. Why doesn’t his carer type character put his trousers back on?

I guess yellow doesn’t look great on him.

On the subject of the carer type characters…

What is Flop from Bing on Cbeebies?What the actual heck is Flop?

The Cbeebies website describe Flop as Bings carer, but where is his parents?

Flop is there when Bing goes to bed, when he wakes up, Bing looks after Flop when he’s ill. If it was just Flop and Bing, I’d suggest that Bing actually had a heart breaking back story, but other characters seem to have similar carer figures. Maybe all the parents have disappeared? Maybe the carers are aliens?

Again, on the subject of the carers…

How do they get Charlie up these stairs?

Bing on Cbeebies

 

They’re not the tallest of characters, do they have extra powers we’ve not seen?

My last question for now is…

Is Everything a “Bing Thing”?

Is Everything a "Bing Thing"?

 

There were my questions, I’m going to finish by quoting someone on the Mumsnet forum who has attempted to answer some of the oddities of Bing Bunny:

I think the adults are little squishy ants because the toddlers are the main characters and subjects of each others’ interest. Adults assist and facilitate. So it’s the world from the toddler’s emotional perspective. (Bit like those diagrams showing a person with body parts in proportion to nerve endings, so relative significance within our brains).

Is there anything about Bing that you cant get your head around?

Does anyone else reckon that Bing is actually about an alien invasion?

Have I over thought this, and should I just watch some Frozen?